Wild Horse
When I think of wild horses my mind immediately goes to movie mode. The movie in particular is "Nights in Rodanthe". It supposed to be an urban legend of sorts about the wild mustangs running down the beach. Of course no one has ever seen them, but everyone knows they are there. It seems such a casual mention in the midst of a beautiful love story. Like most love stories it has a tragic ending and as your heart is breaking right along with the character (cant give too much away lol), we see them. The wild mustangs running the beach. They are so free, so majestic, so beautiful... and of course make you cry a little more. The symbolism in that one scene is obviously one of my favorites. :)
Today's prompt is brought to us by Velvet Verbosity.
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Monday, July 29, 2013
Hi, remember me?
So looking back I have been a horrible blogger and not written anything since March. There are some good reasons for that, but I am back and going to try to be more honest and diligent about my writing.
I, like many have issues with depression. It goes way back, even to things I can't remember. Usually however the darkness was pushed aside to take care of everyone else. Now its just me, alone with my thoughts, alone with the darkness. As a result, I floundered. As the months have progressed, I have hurt myself, I have quit going out with friends, even the walking group that I love dearly seemed overwhelming and too many people. My agoraphobia in general has increased in a frightening capacity, but I am ok with 1 to 3 people at a time. Another thing I am working on. :) We have been trying different antidepressants and hoping to find the right combination so I can feel like me again. I hate feeling so lost, drowning... and Im getting to tired to pretend anymore.
I did take a big step yesterday and went to Pullman to see Lily preform in a play. She had two different parts in "The Stinky Cheeseman and other fairly stupid tales". It was very cute and quite a few talented children. Afterwards Brad and I went along to the cast party which was also very nice. It was hard being around so many people I didn't know, but really glad that B was by my side. He has a calming effect on me, its nice!
Physically I am doing good. My last full CVS episode was in May (happy birthday to me), but they are definitely fewer and farther apart. I still have one or two mini attacks a week, but with my at home regiment I have been able to avoid the er. Yay!! Sure beats being at the hospital 2ce a month!!
Collin will be 2 tomorrow. Where does the time go? He is so happy, and his new family is amazing! We couldn't have asked for anyone better to love him and give him the life and love he deserves! I also count myself to be blessed that they are kind, caring people who still will allow the rest of us in his life. Hes always full of love and cuddles when we see him. He and Liam have fun when together!
Oh my Liam. He is my bright spot on the gloomiest days. I am lucky enough to get to hang with him almost weekly. He is so smart and growing so fast. He will be 2 in September. Lenee and Sean are so good with him, its a joy to see. I'm glad Lenee grew up and has the family she so deserves! <3
Other than those basics, things are still pretty much the same over here in my own little corner of Oz. I am still in the SSI process, but steps are being completed so now the waiting game.
Yeah, thats about all I can think of at moment, but I promise to try to write more about my stuffs :)
I, like many have issues with depression. It goes way back, even to things I can't remember. Usually however the darkness was pushed aside to take care of everyone else. Now its just me, alone with my thoughts, alone with the darkness. As a result, I floundered. As the months have progressed, I have hurt myself, I have quit going out with friends, even the walking group that I love dearly seemed overwhelming and too many people. My agoraphobia in general has increased in a frightening capacity, but I am ok with 1 to 3 people at a time. Another thing I am working on. :) We have been trying different antidepressants and hoping to find the right combination so I can feel like me again. I hate feeling so lost, drowning... and Im getting to tired to pretend anymore.
I did take a big step yesterday and went to Pullman to see Lily preform in a play. She had two different parts in "The Stinky Cheeseman and other fairly stupid tales". It was very cute and quite a few talented children. Afterwards Brad and I went along to the cast party which was also very nice. It was hard being around so many people I didn't know, but really glad that B was by my side. He has a calming effect on me, its nice!
Physically I am doing good. My last full CVS episode was in May (happy birthday to me), but they are definitely fewer and farther apart. I still have one or two mini attacks a week, but with my at home regiment I have been able to avoid the er. Yay!! Sure beats being at the hospital 2ce a month!!
Collin will be 2 tomorrow. Where does the time go? He is so happy, and his new family is amazing! We couldn't have asked for anyone better to love him and give him the life and love he deserves! I also count myself to be blessed that they are kind, caring people who still will allow the rest of us in his life. Hes always full of love and cuddles when we see him. He and Liam have fun when together!
Oh my Liam. He is my bright spot on the gloomiest days. I am lucky enough to get to hang with him almost weekly. He is so smart and growing so fast. He will be 2 in September. Lenee and Sean are so good with him, its a joy to see. I'm glad Lenee grew up and has the family she so deserves! <3
Other than those basics, things are still pretty much the same over here in my own little corner of Oz. I am still in the SSI process, but steps are being completed so now the waiting game.
Yeah, thats about all I can think of at moment, but I promise to try to write more about my stuffs :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)